No Regrets

People who say, “I have no regrets,” are not telling the truth.  They should truthfully say either, “I avoid thinking about my regrets,” or, “I am content with the regrets I have chosen.”  Every choice made in life excludes the opportunity for another experience, given the limits of time and resources.  If I choose to go to the mountains this weekend, I cannot at the same time go to the beach.  While I may prefer the benefits of going to the mountains, I am still missing out on the benefits of going to the beach.  I may choose benefits of self employment, but I miss out on the opportunity to have the relative stability of being an employee of someone else.  I may choose the benefits of not marrying, but I miss out on the opportunity of experiencing the depth of committed relationships of a spouse and children in a cohesive family.  There is a price to be paid for every choice, an opportunity missed for every opportunity taken, a regret to be had for every regret avoided.  The best we can do is to choose our regrets wisely.  --Steven R. Hobbs

Essential Components

Three essential components of psychological health are 1. the ability to openly and honestly communicate thoughts, feelings, and behaviors with another, 2. the ability to honor agreements and disagreements, commonalities and distinctions, and 3. the ability to use personal resources to accomplish values-directed goals.  --Steven R. Hobbs

Build Me a Son

“Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid; one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory.

“Build me a son whose wishes will not take the place of deeds; a son who will know Thee - and that to know himself is the foundation stone of knowledge.

“Lead him, I pray, not in the path of ease and comfort, but under the stress and spur of difficulties and challenge. Here let him learn to stand up in the storm; here let him learn compassion for those who fail.

“Build me a son whose heart will be clear, whose goal will be high; a son who will master himself before he seeks to master other men; one who will reach into the future, yet never forget the past.

“And after all these things are his, add, I pray, enough of a sense of humor, so that he may always be serious, yet never take himself too seriously. Give him humility so that he may always remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, and the weakness of true strength.

“Then I, his father, will dare to whisper, ‘I have not lived in vain.’” —General Douglas MacArthur, a prayer for his son